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Sunday, December 06, 2009

Writers And Worry

Great article today by James Scott Bell on the "Kill Zone" blog.

An excerpt--


I thought I'd reflect a little on worry. Writers, after all, really have no cause to worry about anything, right?


I mean, putting aside anxiety over whether they'll ever get an agent, get published, sell enough to stay published, or if they do get published will they get stink bomb reviews; or wondering if they are real writers or only massive frauds, or if they are doing too little self-promotion, or too much; concerns over whether they're putting undue strain on their marriages or other close relationships; and getting migraines wondering what the future of publishing will look like – discounting all that, writers really have no reason to worry at all.

First, drugs. Luckily for writers, pharmaceutical companies have been on the job to develop several treatments for all manner of writerly concerns. Among the most popular are:


Damitol - relieves symptoms associated with wanting to chuck the whole writing thing. Side effects may include cursing, smashing things and inordinate sobbing. Should not be taken by nursing mothers and church deacons.


Agenex - Controls blood pressure when you have to fire your agent. Side effects may include obsession with the number 15.


Bombasic - makes you think you're charming when drunk (Hemingway reportedly was in a research group for this drug). Side effects may include social opprobrium, intense morning headaches and regret.


Pop over to The Kill Zone to read the rest of this hilarious prescription!

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